Monday, December 22, 2008

WLS Surgery

I promise this isn't turning into a weight loss surgery blog, but my surgery date is official. February 19th, 2009. She first suggested February 12th, but since that is the Thursday before DNow, I thought my student ministry staff and crew would hang me out to dry.

Would love your prayers! Lots to prepare for!

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Surgery Update!

Everyone at one time or another gets one of those phone calls that will change your life. Sometimes, unfortunately more than we would like to admit, these phone calls are bringing bad news....but sometimes, they are delivering good news! I got one today...a life changing phone call. When the caller identified herself as Nancy from the surgeon's office, my heart started hammering in my chest and my breathing became very rapid and shallow. In the two seconds it took her to say hello, I was trying to determine the emotion in her voice--was she happy? Disappointed? I couldn't tell. It seemed like an eternity went by before she said "YOU WERE APPROVED!" Blue Cross approved my gastric bypass surgery!!!

When I hung up the phone, I was all excited and nervous at the same time! I will find out after the holidays what steps happen next. Thank-you for your prayers! A new journey awaits!

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

More on My BIG Decision...

Seven months ago, I made a decision that would ultimately change my life forever. For the better! I wasn't sure I wanted to throw it out there for all (five) of you to read, but I decided to...can't ask for prayer without filling you in on the details. Well, I guess I could but Jenny's post inspired me to share this with everyone for support and encouragement.

I have struggled with weight all my life. ALL my life. Even as a child, I was always heavier than most of the boys in my class. I always felt very self-conscious about it, too. I wouldn't even get on the see saw because I was afraid I would be laughed at when my side fell swiftly to the ground and I thought I might even send my best friend all the way to outer space. So...even at a young age, weighing 10-15 pounds more than my friends, I began to live my life full of shame and regret, not doing things my friends were doing and losing more and more confidence in myself.

I became a Christian when I was 11 years old. Even as a grew in the Lord, I didn't honor Him with how I treated myself. And my parents-they meant well-but I will never forget meeting my dad in the lobby of the city hall and riding up the elevator with him at a time when they still used elevator operators. I was probably 13 or so. The sweet lady running the elevator had known my dad for many years and hadn't seen me since I was a small child (or younger child I guess I should say) and she said something along the lines to my dad about his "pretty daughter" and he said "she is pretty if she would just get this weight off." I was so ashamed. I had let both my parents down. Didn't stop me from eating though!

Kept gaining weight-all through high school and college. My freshman year, I lost about 50 pounds to gain the interest of a guy, which didn't work by the way. About every three years, I have lost 50 pounds, only to gain 60 or 70 back. I don't really know why except when I eat, I have no emotion; I am not thinking about anything about what is going in my mouth. And for a worrier like me, that is very freeing.

Fast forward to now and my BIG decision. After much prayer and conversations with the Lord, I feel led to do gastric surgery. Yes, gastric and drastic rhyme but my health is in a drastic shape. I had to go through seven months of pre-approval doctor visits and had my 7th visit on December 8th. I am waiting on my insurance approval as I type. I hope to hear something this week. Surgery would be in January most likely. This will be my last Christmas as the morbidly obese, self-conscious girl who avoids the camera at all holiday gatherings!

I got to this point when I realized I had stopped living. I didn't go anywhere or do anything unless it was work or home--I've missed weddings, funerals, family gatherings, even concerts. There are bathroom stalls I don't fit in, I worry about going to new restaurants for fear all they have are booths, I hate meeting new people for fear of what they think about me, I can't find any clothes that fit anymore....and in August, I sat down in a chair, and it broke. And my heart and spirit broke with it. I KNOW I am doing the right thing! I can't serve the Lord in my capacity right now. It's time...

Will you pray for me? Pray that Blue Cross approves the surgery. Pray that I will not worry about all the details. Pray that the Lord will be with Dr. Mathews and his staff. Pray that I can handle the 180 degree lifestyle change that will happen after surgery. And pray that the Lord will be glorified through all of this!

Thanks...and I love you all!

Monday, December 15, 2008

My Heading Picture Mt. Cheaha here in lovely Alabama! Isn't it beautiful? I wish it would snow. I am in a snow deprived state...literally and figuratively. Why do I live here? Wish I was in Alaska~no really! I do!

Grumble, Grumble, Grumble

Tonight, I finished wrapping all my presents! Yes! Between last night and tonight, I got 'er done. Now my den looks like both hall closets threw up in here but hey, I'm done. OR SO I THOUGHT!

I started thinking about all the things I had wrapped and realized I am missing a few items. Three to be exact. You know, I try to be all clever and efficient, shop early and get my Christmas shopping under control...but then it backfires on me because THEN I LOSE THEM! I have looked everywhere. I don't get it. Argh!

So I am not really finished. I am now on a hunt for three more presents. I almost think it would be easier to just go and buy them again. If only I could remember what they were...hmmmm.

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Something's in the Chimney...

and it ain't Santa! Oh my! I heard something a couple of nights ago, like something was burrowing in the 10 inches of leaves on the back deck. I scared whatever it was off and hadn't heard it again until tonight. Mark went to investigate and found a hole in the side of the chimney. YAY! Isn't that great news? We still don't know what it is but I pray he finds a new home soon.

We put up a slim 7.5 foot Christmas tree today. We haven't had one in 7 years. I was so excited! There is just something magical about the tree all lit up at night. I turn the lamps off and just sit, basking in the tiny white lights of the tree. Ahhh...what peace that brings...UNTIL!!!

You hear a noise in the chimney! GEEZ!!!!

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Wrapping Time

I love wrapping presents. It is relaxing to me...I take time with each one, making sure the ribbons hang just right, that the edges of the paper are folded under so they are even, I even use double-sided tape so it doesn't show..... BAHAHAHAH! JUST KIDDING! YEAH RIGHT!

I do love wrapping...but after two or three presents I am grumbling under my breath. Most of the time, our gifts are traveling somewhere else so I don't even put bows and ribbon on them. I do wrap EVERYTHING though! I love surprises so I think everything needs to be wrapped. Even if I put it in a gift bag, it gets wrapped before it goes in there. That drives my niece crazy-she rolls her eyes at me when she pulls stuff out of a bag and it's wrapped too. Have to have some element of mystery! Plus, it solves the problem of those who like to peek in the bag before they open it. Not gonna do that in my house!

What did Santa do at your house? We had some wrapped, some just sitting under the tree open. I did find it strange when mom and Santa used the same wrapping paper. Never have figured that one out. Maybe mom ordered it from Santa. Yeah, that's it. Or Santa borrowed some from us because he liked it so well. Hmmm, such a mystery.

All this to say, I have lots to wrap and I have yet to get started. Sigh...wanna help?

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

BIG Decisions...

Wednesday I have an appointment that could be a life changing moment for me! I am very nervous about it and also very excited. As I was reminded today, the nervousness and anger I feel about the whole situation is from the master of lies and I will NOT buy into that garbage!

I am so thankful to be surrounded by encouraging friends and family-I didn't leave out my co-workers because I include them in the friends and family category. Yes, I am beyond blessed!

If you have a minute around 2:00 pm on Wednesday, I would covet your prayers!

Monday, December 8, 2008

Christmastime is here...

One of my favorite Christmas tunes is Christmastime is Here, made popular by Charlie Brown's Christmas Special, which came on tonight by the way. I love this program, I look forward to it every year. I am amazed that it hasn't been banned since it includes the sharing of the true Christmas story. The true meaning of Christmas.

Remember when Charlie gets sent out to get a big, beautiful pink aluminum Christmas tree? Do you remember what he comes back with? A small twig with three pitiful branches. All his "friends" laugh and scoff at him. He hangs his head in shame, crying out "What is the true meaning of Christmas!?!?"

Then Linus takes his place in the spotlight. Reciting the passage out of Luke that so many of us know, but often forget in the hustle and bustle of the season. As he finishes, Charlie smiles, picks up his tree and leaves. He tries to hang one ornament on it and it droops to the ground. Until his friends come along, and somehow, that meek and simple twig became a shining, beautiful tree. They gather around it and hum "Hark the Herald Angels Sing..." What a moment.

I would love to say I would be Linus, reminding everyone what the true meaning of Christmas is. Instead, I am one of the scoffers, mad because traffic has quadrupled during lunch, frustrated that I can't find one register open at Wal-Mart with less than 10 people in it and find myself sighing loudly at the person who took the close parking place. Yeah, not very Linusy...

So as I think of Charlie and his Christmas tree, with three branches and his friends who scoffed at him and laughed, I think of Jesus, hanging on one of three crosses on a hill, surrounded by people who scoffed and laughed at him, yet He is my shining, beautiful Savior.

And for that I am thankful. Merry Christmas!

Saturday, December 6, 2008

So I have started a new bog. I have never had my own blog before. I always felt like it was weird but yet here I am, typing away! I hope you enjoy a glimpse into my life...where my husband, our crazy cat, our families, our friends and anything else in our paths may show up here. Names will always be changed to protect the innocent. Maybe. Hee hee!

So....enjoy! Glad to become a part of the bloggy world!